Settling in, sort of

Hello Friends,
We are kind of settling in to some kind of weird new rhythm. I guess the ups and downs are expected and accepted more, by now. The kids know that Mom needs to rest and sometimes they use it to their advantage! Tom expects little from me, which I'm not sure I like. I feel pretty useless sometimes. I try to contribute when I can. He really is getting anal about the house. It's too funny. He never used to be that way. I suppose it's a way to control your surroundings, when you have little control over other things. I was really proud of myself the other night. I actually made dinner (spaghetti - big deal), cleaned up afterward and got the kids to bed myself. I didn't want Tom to have to come home from a late meeting and face having to clean up. This may seem little to you all, but I felt pretty darn good about it. I hope to start going to jazzercise again the rest of this week.

Things that make me feel good: mint tea, tai chi, jazzercise, finishing laundry, accomplishing any household task, spending time with friends.

Things that make me feel bad: seeing my hair come out in the shower.

The hair falling out has been a slow process. Fortunately, I have a lot of hair. I wonder what will be left by the end of my treatments in July. It's taken me a long time to grow my hair long, I would really hate to have to start over. Oh well. All of the yucky things mean only that the chemo is doing its job. I just have to think of it that way. I think I would worry more if I didn't have any side effects - I would wonder if it's working.

Those are just a few thoughts. I"m not as eloquent as my dear husband.

Love,
Karen